Why is it necessary to talk about family?
I suggest you take yourself with me to reflect on a series of articles around The family and its issues. We are part of a society which is becoming more and more individualistic, bogged down by our personal problems, the place for an “Other” is not always obvious.
What if I told you that through the relationship with the Other, whether they are a family member, spouse or friend, you can manage to overcome a crisis and transcend both personal and collective suffering.
What if the other held precisely the door that you needed to pass through to access a point of view other than yours, which could be your way out of the problem encountered.
Is this reflection intended to go radically opposite to what we are used to hearing:
“You must first be alone before being together”?
Yes and no ! It is fair to think that our personal suffering will color our relationships but in the same way that our relationships can influence us in our own identity. Indeed, these two environments interact with each other.
This approach is called “systemic”. The object of study is no longer just the symptom and how it affects the individual but rather theinteraction and the place that each individual takes within their family system.
This approach was defined by a group of therapists with complementary specialties which gave rise to several theorizations. They start from the postulate that the family is an open system which tends to be maintained by the principle of homeostasis*. An individual's symptom can then be understood as a way of regulating the system itself. The symptom is no longer solely interpreted as being due to an “internal defect” in the individual but as part of a whole, a strategy to protect family balance.
We are built and defined by our environment. We are talking about primary socialization, within our family circle and then as adults. Then, this circle widens and it becomes secondary socialization, bringing together friends, colleagues, mentors and more. These environments defined who we are and through a process of adaptation we developed a personality, a character, unique communication skills, which were the best way to deal with one's own environment.
Taking into account our family context therefore remains essential in therapeutic work in order to best understand the subject of your current suffering.
Are you curious to come explore what made you who you are?
*Homeostasis: Regulatory process by which the body maintains the various constants of the internal environment (all of the body's fluids) within the limits of normal values. Larousse
